Skip to main content

My last "First day of school"

It is too weird to be here. My first year at this new school, yet my senior year too. May be I know some people, but it just feels to epic. I don't have my glasses, I am just seeing faces. I can't get to see anything through everyone's souls. Just faces and voices from their vocal cords. It is bringing me headache and I have nothing to do, nor anything to talk about with anyone.

Oh, right now, first two classes ended and some people I know came, I am supposed to say some friends, but today it feels like another world, to me. I am feeling that because it is my first year here, so I call them all, just people, not friends. 



Away from all of that, I am not ready to make any friendships with anyone here. A friend of mine told me that this school is just full of people who only love to talk and have long gossips about the others. So, no trust gained. I can't even look into peoples' eyes. Those I used to talk with, I just can't talk to them today, it is different. I have the feeling if ecstasy and boredom. Joy and grief. I really can't describe how I do feel now. Words will understate the feelings, so I better keep them to myself. I will just be optimistic and hope this day ends, peacefully and happily. 


Senior 2012.
MHS.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

11 Types of Students you meet at CUFE.

Disclaimer: This post is for fun purpose, so you guys don't take it seriously. It is all about generalizing and no one is particularly targeted. 1- AIESEC Fanatics: They think they are the coolest people taking part in the most cool extracurricular activity. They MUST, I repeat, they must be wearing those lousy aiesec bracelets. They try too hard to look like a badass group specially when it comes to standing at their booth. 2- The Nerd-Extremist There are plenty of this type. Almost everyone in CUFE (Except me ofc). Students from this type would never let their GPA drop less than 4.0 or 3.9. Getting 3.89999999999999 might lead them to some suicidal acts or self-harm. They never skip a class and never leave a lost mark in a quiz unquestioned. 3-The top student-wanna-be These usually have a low IQ, but they are so pretentious. They stick to the nerds' asses and try too hard to befriend them. They never skip lectures,bytlaza2o fel drs w el TAs without mercy,

احداث كلية هندسة من يوم 28 نوفمبر حتي 10 ديسمبر.

بعد تطوّر الاحداث في كلية هندسة القاهرة قررت اني هاحكي كل حاجة بالتفاصيل لتوضيح الامر تماما. منذ بداية العام الدراسي و دايما كان بيكون فيه مظاهرات صغيرة عددها 100تقريبا (لم اتقن العد) داخل الجامعة تهتف ضد حكم العسكر و مؤيدة لرابعة. ماكنش بيكون فيه اي مشاكل و لا اشتباكات داخل هندسة مع العلم ان كان فيه ايام بيكون فيه برّة عند مسلّة جامعة القاهرة اشتباكات بس كانت مش بتدوم طويلا. يوم الخميس 28 نوفمبر, كان فيه وقفة كبيرة برّة عند جامعة القاهرة و كان الطلبة اللي عاملين مسيرة جوة هندسة واقفيت عند الباب الرئيسي لكلية هندسة الذي اُغلق امامهم لمنعهم من الخروج عند المسيرة الاكبر و ربما اغلقه الامن الجامعي لسلامة الطلاب لشدة الاشتباكات في الخارج. الطلبة ظلّوا يريدون فتح الباب و الخروج مع العلم ان الباب الخلفي عند مبني اعدادي كان ايضا مغلقا لموقعه جانب كمين الداخلية و دبابات الجيش المحيطة بالجامعة. تك القاء اول قنبلة غاز داخل كلية هندسة و اصدمت بمدني الادارة الموجود امام الباب الرئيسي تماما و تم القاء القنبلة الثانية و تطايرت بعيدا تماما عن مكان الطلبة المتجمعين عند الباب الرئيسي لتستقر امام

I don't know.

Some things happen without a sign or a miracle. I lost all my wars and battles, and I don't know why. I feel sad, all the time, like there is nothing that ever make me smile again although I try. I fail, and I don't know why. I am always down, being grabbed deeper below by some abstract force and I don't fight myself. I don't know how. I have lost interests in all what I have always loved and I can't go back. I can't get you, nor my old self back. I won't try because I know my inner voice will say 'I don't know'. I don't know what I am writing now or what's the point, but if you are asking; here's my answer: I don't know.  I take long walks into the dark side. I like it in a way that I have never known. I am messy, emotionally numb and confused. Don't ask, we both know that I don't know.  I watch people and sank into their moves and unspoken words. I know them all, but when it comes to me saying what I saw out loud, I just